As he staggered toward me, the image of a once a horrendous monster who used to abuse me, was nothing but a wounded and mummified creature.. defeated as he may seemed, his sorrow in his eyes, the sadness of aura that he brought. As his wounds bleed within his bandages, my heart filled with pain n bleed together as each beat pounded.


Where is the king of all kings that used to be so up high? The image I saw of him was nothing but a beast who was torn apart by someone whom did not cherish him as much as I did. Every breath I drew filled with paroxysm. The out burst of sensation where the agonizing sourness fill up every essence of my soul, every part of me.



Every night, the same nightmare haunts me, I cried in silence, letting the agony engulf me just like the darkness that covers the night sky. I cried tears of pain, agony, sorrow and heart break. The creature whom I once cherished and loved had been cut up due to his outrage of anger.

To me, I'm used to it. As once his wife, i endured with whatever i could put up.

I am a daughter, a mum, a grand daughter, a friend. The roles that I've played in my life, I was once his partner, a student, a young girl and now I am a grown woman. I was once broken but make whole again.

I am confident, but scar for life during the battles i fought for the liberty I have today. I learn to be careful but at times still careless, I was misunderstooded, misguided, misleaded perhaps .. but i am hardworking, and determined. Therefore I changed.

I wish on the stars, Dream on my Dreams .. Cry my tears .. oh so every night in the reticence alone.



I smile on the outside while I'm dying on the inside. I listened to others whom (Daniel) whom wont listen to me. I walk on egg shells and even on fire, I strongly believe in passion but never in true love. I am everything and on the contrary, I am nothing all at once.

Sometimes I am in despair, when the person I care about heartlessly left and chosen another. But the truth is, its not my lost but his (Daniel). Because he left the only person in this whole wide world who would never give up on him. Being the fact that he is still my daughter's father.

I've done my best ... even as a friend. Ended up got blamed for harassing that slut who cut him up and broke his heart ... all these years, i protected him ... never wanted him to bleed. i'd rather the person who is bleeding and mummified is me ... my aching heart.. traumatized feelings are daunting me ... cant concentrate.. cant work .. cant think properly .... night after night having the same dream of him being dismembered, wrapped up and thrown into the sea ....

the blood the pain .....

Give me a reason to believe that you are gone and never coming back ... Some say I'm crazy for your love but no bonds can hold me back from being still caring over you. The softly spoken words that once you have given me ....


and even in death my love goes on ....






~=+Shynna Just Being Surrealistical+=~




Surrealistic Shynna