7/20/2008 11:27:00 am | Sunday 20 July 2008
~=+ Break up Den BreaK Down +=~
ytd (20/07/08) i went to have a closure with charles. at 1st he din wana tok. when i met up wit him, he even wanted to watch a movie. i had to force him to sit down at MOS burger at bugis.
i forced him to tell me the truth. y izit that i tried so hard and yet i'm still not gd enuf. after knwing de whole story. i kept quiet and respected his choice. after which i proceed to meet up wit wendy n angela for coffee and "console" sesssion.
on the way to orchard road to meet them, charles stood there beside me as he was heading home to yishun. i was trembling the who time. i tried to walk n stand far away. i even tried to manuvouer into de crowd hope that i wont travel in the same cabin as he is......
he still come walk beside me... duhz... make me tremble and hold back my hot tears. i started to sms my frens to divert m attention .. so that i wont cry. no an extend i called angela up. i acted very calm n cool... tok some crap to her. till the annnouncement says "orchard". charles n i briefly baded farewell n i ran out of the train.
once im out... i broke DOWN. YESH~ shynna broke down in de middle of orchard road... FUCK... i cant help it or hold back those hot tears any longer.. angela had to rush down by cab to far east plaza to comfort me.
we waited for Wendy to finish work den we sat outside KFC at far east doing nothing for 30mins cos i was having some anxiety attack. trembling, sweating, crying.....
after i recollected myself. angela suggest that i should be de strong shynna... not de weak eunice who loves to cry. den ok lo.. i took a deep breath n told her that after crying i will feel better. den she suggested we go 97... duhz... she wan see shynna's "men fishing" skills.. more DUHZ....
de 3 of us headed to 97, ordered a jug of beer. listen to songs. 3 of us sat there quietly in the boliao environment.. so boliao... like i feel so not right to be at 97... lagi lagi DUHZ DUHZ DUHZ... after 1jug i told angela i wanted to go home i dun feel right.
Den de ku niang angela suggested tt we go to a pub where Jas work. drinks cheaper and can sing. i was like k lo. so went tgt wit wendy.
reach jas's work place, ordered 1 more jug.. den saw wendy's biao ge. i sat there quietly. drink. still feeling not right. so uneasy all over.. kip telling myself tt shynna is strong... den SOME IDIOT go sing de song jay chou de AN JING.
i broke down uncontrollably AGAIN for de 2nd time dis time... de break down lasted longer den USUAL. more more more more more more DUHZ... den is all feeling so fucked up... den ... WALAO ... F.I.R song .. ---- TIAN TIAN YEYE... FUCK... CRY MORE AGAIN... za dao ppl at the pub.
last song b4 go home at the pub .... isd reli fucking duhz n make me CRY WHOLE NITE!!! --- 3 doors down --- HERE WITOUT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WTF.... its a CRYING NIGHT man...
end of the day had 3 jugs in total wit wendy n angela. reach home slump on de sofa in de hall n slumber... so long never drink, now drink 3 juggies wit 3 frens oso SLUMBER.. KNS
Den dream of him again.. DUHZ.. wake up 1st thing in de morning.. CRY AGAIN... WALAO... WADS WRONG WIT ME.. kip on crying... fuck. i wana stop dis feelings of sadness lo. y CANT I Y CANT I???????????!!! ARGH~~~
1st time in my life i cried so much over a man. DUHZ DUHZ DUHZ... den now sit here write blog.. OSO CRY!! FUCK..
rest at home today. dun feel like going anywhere. juz cry to my hearts content den say. juz dun break down n go back to see BHM can le. JIBAI LA....
MY Creature Walked Out on Me.
